http://www.infjs.com/archive/index.php/t-1623.html

It's natural for Fe to want to accommodate others. It's also natural for it to get confused when it wants to accommodate two 'opposed' groups.

Being yourself means accommodating if you are an Fe user.



But is this always true? When I accommodate, I'm not necessarily being myself but it's because the alternative is usually problematic. If i were to "be myself" it wouldn't be as socially accepted or comfortable, so to create an awkward free situation, we accommodate. So yes, I value social comfort rather than social discomfort, but it can be unhealthy since it often involves striking in many cases a self sacrificing compromise which could lead to an identity crisis. Now, I wouldn't want to be rude or make anyone uncomfortable but when I am the most comfortable being myself, people are not very accepting, and then i feel self conscious and uncomfortable so I accommodate to relieve the tension. So, I don't necessarily agree that being yourself means accommodating if you are a Fe user.